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Samantha Ettus Expert Spotter, Samantha Ettus, interviews this month's featured experts, Darcy Miller and Jon Gordon.

"No matter what kind of person you are, even if you are very relaxed, there is some 'bride' gene that kicks in when you're planning a wedding."
— Darcy Miller

"You can't replace sleep with a double latte. There are more coffee houses than ever and we are more tired than ever."
— Jon Gordon

DARCY MILLER writes the "How to plan a wedding" chapter in The Experts' Guide to 100 Things Everyone Should Know How to Do.

Darcy Miller is Editorial Director of Weddings for Martha Stewart Omnimedia and the author of Our Wedding Scrapbook.

Samantha: What do you think of the whole "Bridezilla" culture?
Darcy: The word "Bridezilla" may be a bit stereotypical and extreme. But I will say that no matter what kind of person you are, even if you are very relaxed, there is some "bride" gene that kicks in when you're planning a wedding—especially as the day approaches. There are some crazy stories (of brides asking their attendants to dye their hair the same color so they look uniform, etc.) but this is not the norm.

Samantha: What are the next big trends in weddings?
Darcy: There is the continuing trend of personalizing the day. White is no longer the only bridal option: Pastels and soft colors are making their way into everything from wedding dresses to cakes. There is use of brighter colors, especially in destination weddings, which are a continuing trend. Brides also are embracing soft, romantic hairstyles and anything that looks natural, not structured.

Rather than having one dress, brides are now choosing two: one for the ceremony and another for the reception.

Samantha: If you can only splurge on two elements of the wedding what should they be?
Darcy: I feel it's worth investing in good music because that sets the tone for the entire event. I also believe that it pays to have some help with the organizing and planning, even if it just means hiring a wedding planner for the day. No matter how gorgeous the party is, if you are stressing about the place cards, it will take away from your special day.

Samantha: What is the ideal amount of time to plan a wedding?
Darcy: At Martha Stewart Weddings, we usually recommend at least six months to plan a wedding. If you give yourself less time you will have less flexibility and fewer options. I believe that it's not ideal to be engaged for much longer than a year. But of course this depends on your situation.

Samantha: Many consider you to be the ultimate arbiter of weddings. What would people be surprised to hear about your own wedding day mishaps?
Darcy: Even though there weren't any major mishaps, there were little things that did not go as planned. The centerpieces were supposed to be alternating arrangements of calla lilies and compotes of fresh figs. But the day before the event, all the figs got confiscated in the delivery, due to a bug problem. My florist called me with the news and I tried to take the advice I give to brides: When it's a few days before the wedding, just let go. Focus on what's important—you are getting married!

Samantha: What is the most unusual thing you have ever seen happen at a wedding?
Darcy: I remember a wedding in Palm Beach, Florida where someone knocked into the cake on the dance floor and it fell off the table!

To learn more about Martha Stewart Weddings visit www.marthastewart.com/weddings
To learn more about Darcy Miller visit http://www.darcymiller.net

JON GORDON writes the "How to increase your energy" chapter in The Experts' Guide to Life at Home.

Jon Gordon is a leading authority on developing positive, engaged people, leaders, businesses, schools and teams. He is the author of several books, including The Energy Bus: 10 Rules to Fuel your Life, Work and Team with Positive Energy. He is a corporate speaker and appears regularly on many national shows.

Samantha: What is the right power breakfast to maximize our energy throughout the day?
Jon: It's important to kick start your morning with protein and fiber which helps you sustain blood sugar levels and maintain your energy. A simple breakfast is hardboiled eggs and fruit. I also like a bowl of energy -- homemade oatmeal with raisins, apples, and chopped walnuts.

Samantha: How does energy impact the workplace?
Jon: Energy is the currency of personal and professional success. If you don't have energy you can't lead, inspire, sell, or make a difference. Fatigue costs companies 77 billion dollars a year and negativity costs 300 billion dollars. We know that companies that create a culture that infuses their employees and customers with positive energy are more successful and create results. Not the rah rah, cheering kind of positive energy but the kind that is infused with optimism, vision, trust, purpose, enthusiasm and spirit.

Samantha: If you spend your day next to a negative co-worker, how should you handle it?
Jon: Negative people are actually great teachers that help us to become stronger and more positive. If we get affected by a negative co-worker it means that we need to develop our positive energy muscles. Our positive energy must be greater than anyone's negativity. So the first step is to be positive yourself and seek to shine a light on this person. Try to get them on the bus with your positive attitude rather than trying to change theirs. Or post a sign in your office that says "No Energy Vampires Allowed".

Samantha: Are there any celebrities that you consider models of high energy?
Jon: Oprah is a great example. High energy doesn't mean that you are bouncing off the walls. Rather I think of it in terms of "power" and how much power you bring to life and share with others. I also love Ellen's energy. Kelly Ripa has great energy. Denzel Washington, Will Smith, John Travolta and Tom Cruise have incredibly powerful and high energy.

Samantha: How do you get your friends and family out of a bad mood?
Jon: I don't necessarily try to get them out of a bad mood because only they can turn themselves around, but I try to inspire them to make a change with a positive story, or make them laugh or talk about trust, hope, faith and my favorite is something I use to do with my mother a lot before she passed away and that is walking and talking.

Samantha: Is there one quick physical activity you can do to increase your energy?
Jon: My favorite energy booster of all is the 10 Minute Thank you Walk. While you are walking simply say what you are thankful for. It's physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time. It's the way our brains are wired. When you are feeling blessed you won't be stressed.

Samantha: What is the biggest energy mistake most people make?
Jon: We don't sleep enough and then try to make up for a lack of sleep with too much caffeine that only makes us more tired in the long run. If people would just get more sleep they would feel more energetic, think more clearly, enjoy life more, and enhance their health. You can't replace sleep with a double latte. There are more coffee houses than ever and we are more tired than ever.

To learn more about Jon Gordon and his new book visit http://www.jongordon.com/energybuspromo.html
 
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